Breast health is a serious topic.
So serious in fact, that we enlisted the help of the SRSLY funny girls, Alexandra Fiber and Danielle Gibson, to offer some fun education tips for Breast Cancer Awareness month. Alex & Danielle have created the incredible webseries, SRSLY, which showcases an amazingly accurate portrayal of the modern woman’s thought process. The hilarious skits leave you wittily impressed, and also a little confused if they somehow know the inner workings of your brain; their relatability and unabashed sense of humor make them the perfect duo to talk about boobies. Read on superwomen!
Get That Body (And Those Boobs) Moving
Exercise is crucial for healthy breasts because it gets your lymphatic system — aka the one that rids your breast tissue of harmful toxins — moving! So make a playlist of perky tunes (pun intended) and hit the gym, take a yoga class, or, if you’re like us, just bounce around your apartment to the new Carly Rae Jepsen until you collapse in a sweaty pile on the floor.
Get To Second Base — With Yourself!
Even if it’s not on your Facebook profile, you’re always gonna be “In A Relationship,” with your breasts. Honor that commitment by massaging them regularly! Be consistent and you’ll keep your lymphatic fluids flowing. You’ll also know right away if something feels off, so you can contact your couples’ counselor.* (*Your doctor. Get it? …Couples counselor? Nevermind.)
Talk To Your Mom About Her Boobs
And your grandma’s boobs. And your cousin’s boobs! Knowing your family history is invaluable when it comes to monitoring your breast health. Take notes and be sure to bring them to your doctor’s appointment. After that, you’re free to go back to ignoring your Mom’s calls. (Justkiddingmomwewouldneverdothat.)
Pound Water Like It’s Beer During Senior Week
Well, maybe not that much, but definitely enough to stay happy and hydrated. Drinking water keeps your whole system humming inside, and your skin — including your decolletage — glowing on the outside. Plus, think of all the Instagrams you can take of your Cool Gear bottle.
Don’t. Smoke. Cigarettes.
…Do we really have to say why? Just don’t!
Insist On A “Shoes Off, Bras Off” Policy
Studies suggest that wearing a snug or too-tight fitting bra can negatively impact breast tissue, so whenever you’re just hanging out at home, give your breasts a break and let ‘em loose! (Waving your bra around your head screaming, “FREE AT LAST!!!!” is optional.)
Cool It On The Booze
Sometimes we need a glass of red to unwind after intense Thursday night TV — How Do You Get Away With Murder, am I right? — but try to keep it to one glass. Recent studies have shown that heavy alcohol consumption can increase hormone production linked to breast cancer. Consider swapping your regular drink for some infused sparkling water, we’re sure Shonda would approve.
Experts agree: when you relax, your breasts relax! Try to find some time in your day when you can de-stress; take a long walk, do a face mask, download a meditation app on your phone — anything that makes you feel centered. You’ll decrease harmful stress hormones and inflammation, keeping you and your breasts calm, happy, and healthy.
The SRSLY Girls (aka Alexandra Fiber & Danielle Gibson) are a New York based writer-performer team, and full-time BFFs. Their work has been featured in The New York Times, GLAMOUR, New York and more. They also host Funny Lady Film Club, a weekly comedy podcast dedicated to women and film. For more info: www.thesrslygirls.com